Wedding Plans

A couple's plans for a small commitment ceremony have grown into a major event.

By Glenn Gullickson

Carlos Gastelo and Mario Murillo

Commitment ceremony grows into full-scale family affair

When Carlos Gastelo and Mario Murillo decided that they wanted to seal their relationship with a commitment ceremony, the men thought they would just have a small service.

But after a year of planning, the guest list for the Nov. 5 ceremony grew to more than 250 people and the event will involve dinner, dancing and all the extras that go along with a traditional wedding.

Gastelo said it was his mother's idea to stage a full-scale event and he said the result will also be a tribute to her as she battles a cancer diagnosis.

"She's doing a lot of planning," Gastelo said. "This is something very important to her. You just never know, tomorrow's not promised."

Gastelo said he and Murillo have been "going strong" since they met online about five years ago. They've lived together for the past two years. Carlos Gastelo and Mario Murillo Murillo said that Gastelo popped the question in August 2010 during a helicopter ride during a trip to Sedona. Ever since, the men and their families have been planning the ceremony.

Gastelo said he's a little shocked that everyone accepted the idea of a same-sex ceremony. "Families on both sides are definitely open to the gay community," he said.

Gastelo's mother, Irene Contreras, has had a big part in the planning, working on everything from music to attire to funding for the ceremony. "She's basically been my best friend throughout this," he said.

The planning has also provided a distraction for Contreras, a breast cancer survivor, who will start six months of chemotherapy for uterine cancer a week after the event, Gastelo said.

Gastelo said he and Murillo attended wedding expos where they found an officiant who will perform the ceremony and a string quartet that will be part of the event.

Gastelo recalled that at one expo the men had to explain themselves when they were both identified as grooms and others wondered where their brides were.

The ceremony will be at the Babylon Banquet Hall in Phoenix, a venue that Gastelo said was welcoming and had a wedding planner who works with gay couples. Carlos Gastelo and Mario Murillo The men will be wearing tuxedos when they walk down the aisle; Gastelo with his mother and grandmother, Murillo with his parents. Each man will have two couples standing up for them as "friends of honor."

The ceremony will be followed by dinner of Cordon Bleu and a four-tier wedding cake from My Goodness Cakes. The room will be decorated in black, red and what Gastelo called "bling."

A DJ will provide the music for a celebration that will start with a mother and son dance.

Both men are Phoenix natives. Gastelo, 24, works as a bank customer service representative. Murillo, 28, works in customer service for the Phoenix Water Department.

For Murillo, who said that the men plan to buy a house, the commitment ceremony marks an important time in their lives. "I feel like our life together will start to begin," he said. -E